The shock and numbness has been wearing off and I can definitely tell the difference.  I remember the week after it happened and I can't imagine that feeling again.  It was horrible, it was like life, as I knew it, was over forever.  I know Kevin would never want me to feel like that, and thankfully that feeling has passed.  The feeling of hope is one that cling to.  Before this happened I feel like I lived life in a blissfully naive state and was completely unaware of what things could really be like.  When talking to other widows and friends who have lost someone they loved so much it is like life takes on a new meaning.  I cherish the relationships I have so much more.  Kevin was such an incredible person and I was always in awe of how he could never say a bad thing about anyone.  He was truly an inspiration to me to seek the good in everyone.
          I love the picture above of him.  He was so content sitting at home watching the Vikings game with me, Konrad, and a Bud Light.  I was never much of a fan of watching the Vikings...I miss fighting over the remote with him.