It's coming to the end of another exhausting week and I can't believe how much time has flown by. I feel like time has gone so slow and so fast at times that it is hard to keep track of where I really am in the year. It's been 9.5 months and it feels like 9.5 years...yet some days it still feels like 9.5 days.  I was having a particularly hard night on Tuesday and I picked up one of my grief books I haven't read in a while called "I wasn't ready to say Goodbye." Before I opened it I prayed for some friends who have recently lost a loved one and then I asked God and Kevin to help me. I am drastically lacking motivation to study and I need a good kick in the ass to get going when I get home from a long day of being at the hospital. It isn't like a normal job where I can come home, cook dinner, and relax. I still have exams to study for and assignments to do, and I have to do it 6 times a week. However...I have no motivation to do any of it. I asked Kevin to help me get my motivation back.  Just as I opened the book a piece of paper fell out of one of the pages. It was a note from him. He used to send me inspirational letters and this was the first one he sent me. My heart stopped. I haven't picked this book up in 4 months and out of the blue...on this night...I decided I was going to read it. The letter said how proud of me he was and how much he missed me. The tears, of course, flowed. In that instant I was completely reassured that he has always, and will always be around me. God always works in mysterious ways and I know he and Kevin will always be giving me a little push along the way!